I still find myself counting the Sundays, remembering the 23rd, and feeling the urge to call him or check in….
In some sense I wish life would return to the before grief stage….
I also realize how much I am changed by the death of my brother, how much I experienced the kindness of others, how quickly my appreciation for my family was deepened, how intentional I have become about saying what needs to be said, how tender my heart feels as it goes from shattered to restored….
I believe that God knew my journey would include this major grief event….
I believe that God will provide me all I need as I continue the day-to-day journey of my life….
I believe that we all experience grief, loss and brokenness and through Len’s death, I am invited to connect more deeply with those who also have a story of loss….
It has been difficult to focus on my journey to wellness these past 3 months. I have resumed normal activities but find that I am still returning from mindless to mindful living….
I am committed to living honestly, healthy and well and that will only be done if I return fully to mindful living….
And so as each day comes and goes, as the tears flow and laughter resumes, in our remembering, reflecting and creating new memories…..
I know Len’s memory will never leave my heart ~ no matter how much time passes!