Journey to my heart….

12 years ago this sweet girl came into our lives. When we went to Haiti to meet her for the first time, I learned that the girls at the orphanage loved to do hair. Even with my short hair, they managed to fill my head with ponytails and beads.

Over the years I found someone locally who excelled in extensions and every so often when Sonta was in town we would make an appointment with Jewel. I was pretty proud of myself for finding the right hair salon, but I didn’t really educate myself about all this Haitian hair involved.

As Sonta entered her teen years she began to learn to do her own hair. The first time I walked into a beauty supply store that sold hair, I was overwhelmed with all the choices. I began to understand the options and costs of the many variations. I had a greater understanding of the financial implication related to hair that was managed very differently than the hair on my white head. I saw Sonta’s eye’s light up with all the possibilities from color and length to straight or curly.

This weekend we revisited the beauty supply store. Sonta is now into crocheting her braids and can change her look with her own fantastic skill. No need for appointments with Jewel anymore. I was reminded again of how this young woman navigates her world, learns what she needs and wants to learn and portrays God’s beautiful design for her whole being.

Last night I watched Sonta change up her look. I learned how she takes out what hair she has in, oils her head (glad I had bought the high-quality Olive Oil), braids her own shorter hair and secures the new hair we had bought.

Honestly, I felt a bit ashamed of how long this dear girl has been in my life, and I had never been curious enough to ask more. I wonder where you would benefit from being curious this week. I learned about hair, but in the process of being together and learning more, I learned about so much more than hair. I learned even more about this brave courageous Haitian girl whose heart really longs to return to her birth country and who loves her family right here in Michigan as well. We talked about the upcoming trip we hope to take to Haiti and envisioned what that will be like all while her hands moved like magic with a crochet hook making braids.

Go and learn something new this week, be curious and admire the soul who is teaching you!

 

 

I am a lover of words. It is no secret. I have words all over my home. I like to write them, speak them, study them and believe they hold power.

Words have the power to bless or curse, heal or wound, invite others to laughter or leave them unsettled for a long time. I will always be an advocate for people to think carefully about the words they write or speak.

It has been fun to see my 8-year-old niece enjoy one of the gifts I gave her for Christmas. I gave this book to her and her Mom as a joint gift. She then bought the calendar because she loves it all so much. There is something in the words and the pictures that ignite a powerful sense of acceptance.

Girls being fearless. Girls being silly. Girls being wild, stubborn, and proud. Girls whose faces are smeared with dirt and lit up with joy. So simple and yet so powerful, Strong Is the New Pretty celebrates, through more than 175 memorable photographs, the strength and spirit of girls being 100% themselves.

Real beauty isn’t about being a certain size, acting a certain way, wearing the right clothes, or having your hair done (or even brushed). Real beauty is about being your authentic self and owning it. Kate T. Parker is a professional photographer who finds the real beauty in girls, capturing it for all the world to see in candid and arresting images.

A celebration, a catalog of spirit in words and smiles, an affirmation of the fact that it’s what’s inside you that counts. Strong Is the New Pretty conveys a powerful message for every girl, for every mother and father of a girl, for every coach and mentor and teacher, for everyone in the village that it takes to raise a strong and self-confident person.

I wasn’t sure it would resonate with this spunky niece of mine, but she has caught the idea and it is so fun to hear her identify her favorite pictures and why she likes this one or that one.

If you have some girls in your life and you are committed to building their self-image and understanding of their beauty, consider the messages you are communicating through the words you speak. Commit to using your words or the words you gift to them, to inspire a vision for all they are and can be.

Tonight is part of what I love about my life. I planned for a quiet night home. It has been a busy week, and my brain is full. I received a text today from Sonta: can I sleep over? Absolutely I said!

Tonight I learned Olivia was driving in from Detroit to hang out with Karolyn. Can we sleep over? Absolutely I said!  I picked Karolyn up at 8 and Olivia will arrive soon.

And the amazing thing is that Karolyn is working on her computer in the other room and Sonta is upstairs calling it a day after a long week. I am home, it is quiet, and I have some of those I love the most right in my house with me. I had a sweet texting conversation with my nephew, and we are making plans to watch two basketball games tomorrow of the cousins.

I am committed to more routine and structure this year in the spaces where spontaneity sabotages my goals. But spontaneity is also a gift and rolling with it and letting my beds fill up is one of my favorite things.

I wonder where spontaneity will show up in your weekend in a way that offers you some of what you deeply enjoy and not throw you totally off track. Enjoy where goodness surprises you and enriches your life. At the end of a busy week with lots of questions and unknowns, I am aware of God’s incredible goodness. I am grateful! 

 

I have noticed something lately that I want to name. It is not something I am proud of, but I have become more aware of it in these last weeks. We have been dealing with an ongoing caregiver shortage at Visiting Angels. I wish it were something that we were doing wrong and could quickly change, but it isn’t that simple. We have tried many things including job fairs and facebook ads. Getting people in the door is hard. We have a few people schedule interviews and never show up. It is a real problem and one that does not change by positive thinking or the commitment to never give up.

I have noticed that my brain is weary as a result of this and my capacity feels like it is shrinking some. A shortage of caregivers brings other struggles, causing us to turn away services to people in need. My co-workers said to me last week, it just isn’t fun to say no to people when they call for care. People call with the hope we will help, and we have to say we can not assist you at this time. We do our best to offer perspective and invite them to call back, but will we have more caregivers tomorrow, or the next day?

But I learned a valuable lesson this week about how I am approaching my day to day. I have begun to believe that things aren’t possible. Not everything, but little things. A client asking for a new caregiver or adding hours, my first thought is that it just isn’t possible. Well, I was in one of those spaces and saying to my co-worker, it just isn’t possible and she said how about this? She had a solution that would work, and I had entirely missed it. It was evident to me I was shutting my mind and eyes to possibility. I am so very thankful for that lesson. I have recommitted to embracing a perspective that is all about potential. Believing that there is an option for most everything we will encounter if I am willing to consider every angle.

I am still weary and hoping for 15 more caregivers to walk through our door and apply for work. I am still uncertain of how a change will come to be, but I am committed to holding onto hope. I believe that we will continue to carry out our mission every day. I am choosing to focus on the many times we can and do say yes to new clients because we do have possibilities and I want to believe that this too will pass and God will prepare the way. And we have 55 amazing caregivers who go forth every day and provide excellent care. There is so much to be grateful for.

I wonder where you might be weary and fatigued and shutting your eyes to possibility. I hope you also have someone in your world who will remind you of all that is possible. Don’t lose hope my friends in spaces you feel weary and uncertain. Consider all that is possible and never forget to always hang onto hope!

I am meeting weekly with my friend to set our weekly goals and name our wins for the week. We also name where we know our choices did not align with our stated intentions. It is beneficial to know that each week I will have a conversation about how my choices support or sabotage my desires for change in my mind, body, and soul.

Last week I said I wanted to be more attentive to how I felt when eating. I have never paid much attention to that and yet know that I have sensitivities to some foods and I would like to identify which foods affect me in which ways.

Being attentive has been a fascinating process. I am learning things about how my body responds and feels, about when my energy is high or low and feeling the impact of going diet coke and sugar-free this week.

To be attentive to something specific is a very deliberate process. Often I move through the day aware of so much but being genuinely attentive to nothing. I enjoy the nights I am working at The Journey Christian Counseling Center because I feel fully attentive to one person. But to choose to be fully attentive to something in my own body takes even more discipline. I now believe that to tune all my senses inward after eating to identify how I feel is much more than a one-week goal. I think I have tapped into yet another journey of a lifetime.

I am recognizing that the attentiveness is bringing awareness and the awareness is shaping my choices as I consider new information. I used to think this was an act of discipline, I now believe it is an act of kindness towards myself.

I wonder what it is that you would like to be attentive to. Is there something within your own journey or is there a person who would benefit from your attentiveness. How do our phones, TV’s, Netflix, computers, Ipads, (name your vice) deter us from being attentive to people or spaces that are important to us?

There are so many areas to grow. Consider naming one area you would like to be more attentive and approach it with kindness and curiosity!

I see it all over social media

What is Your Word?

I have pondered and wondered and reflected, trying to settle on a word that will carry me through?

I have wondered about a word big enough that stays with me through 12 months.

A word that reminds me of what is right and invites me to grow.

A word that settles my heart and brings me peace in the midst of daily busyness and activity?

A word that invites me to settle in and stop analyzing?

A word that encourages me to live into all that awaits me.

Of all the words I looked at and considered, I came up with a word that requires my engagement and action.

Creating Space

Creating space to practice my cooking skills, to reflect, to be active.

Creating space for devotions and friends and family, for alone time and daily routine.

Creating Space feels right for me in 2018.

I wonder what word will inspire you in 2018? I hope you will think on this idea and commit to one by February 1, 2018. I am sharing a whole list of options to inspire your thinking. Dream and enjoy the process of envisioning what will be right for you in 2018!

Tomorrow we remember Martin Luther King Jr. I wonder what this means in your mind, heart, and schedule tomorrow? Today I have taken time to listen to his speech, reading and learning more about him and considering the compelling questions that result from Dr. King’s life and teachings. 

The King Center posts the following on their web page:

It is a day of interracial and intercultural cooperation and sharing. No other day of the year brings so many peoples from different cultural backgrounds together in such a vibrant spirit of brother and sisterhood. Whether you are African-American, Hispanic or Native American, whether you are Caucasian or Asian-American, you are part of the great dream Martin Luther King, Jr. had for America. This is not a black holiday; it is a peoples’ holiday. And it is the young people of all races and religions who hold the keys to the fulfillment of his dream.

Dr. King once said that we all have to decide whether we “will walk in the light of creative altruism or the darkness of destructive selfishness. Life’s most persistent and nagging question, he said, is `what are you doing for others?’” he would quote Mark 9:35, the scripture in which Jesus of Nazareth tells James and John “…whosoever will be great among you shall be your servant; and whosoever among you will be the first shall be the servant of all.” And when Martin talked about the end of his mortal life in one of his last sermons, on February 4, 1968, in the pulpit of Ebenezer Baptist Church, even then he lifted up the value of service as the hallmark of a full life. “I’d like somebody to mention on that day Martin Luther King, Jr. tried to give his life serving others,” he said. “I want you to say on that day, that I did try in my life…to love and serve humanity.

We call you to commemorate this Holiday by making your personal commitment to serve humanity with the vibrant spirit of unconditional love that was his greatest strength, and which empowered all of the great victories of his leadership. And with our hearts open to this spirit of unconditional love, we can indeed achieve the Beloved Community of Martin Luther King, Jr.’s dream.

What role will I play in unconditional love and service to all people? What role will you play in achieving the community of Martin Luther King Jr.’s dream? Some of his great quotes inspire me to join the vision again and perhaps most importantly to remember to speak the truth and not be silent.

As I end this post tonight, I leave you with some of my favorite quotes from this man who cast a vision and is known for his courage, truth, justice, compassion, dignity, humility and service.

In the End, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.             

Martin Luther King, Jr.

Faith is taking the first step even when you don’t see the whole staircase.

Martin Luther King, Jr.

An individual has not started living until he can rise above the narrow confines of his individualistic concerns to the broader concerns of all humanity    

Martin Luther King, Jr.
I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character.

Martin Luther King, Jr.

Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.
Martin Luther King, Jr.

 

Today I spent time preparing Beef Stew for Sunday dinner. I am hosting my family, and due to some limited table space in my kitchen, it often works best to make a one-dish meal. So with some consultation, Beef Stew was selected for the menu.

This morning at Costco I had expected to find the carrots and potatoes and be on my way. As I glanced at the potatoes, I saw a 5lb bag of colorful potatoes. They were a perfect size, and I will admit, I was drawn to the colors. I began to envision a stew that wasn’t just brown meat and golden potatoes but was delighted that this Beef Stew would have a splash of color.

As I went to find the bag of carrots, I have to admit, I was almost giddy. Never did I even consider that I would discover colorful carrots. All of a sudden the whole Beef Stew Dish was becoming delicious, not only in imagined flavor but also in presentation.

One of my goals for 2018 is to increase in my kitchen skills and to become comfortable in working with foods from the earth. I am learning that the enjoyment of foods from the ground is much greater than I ever dreamed of. I am looking forward to serving colorful stew to some of my favorite people.

I wonder if you have considered color in the foods you consume each day? Give it some thought, go explore the produce section and live the adventure of colorful nutrition that comes from the earth.

Do you ever end a week and feel filled to capacity in your mind and heart?

Full of thoughts

Full of wonder

Full of worry

Full of gratitude.

I have had that kind of week. I have much to consider in the coming weeks in my business, in my personal life, in my leadership at my Church, in my desire for new routines and outcomes and in those spaces where my heart feels disrupted and unsettled.

I have learned that when I start to feel that I am reaching capacity, I must pay close attention to a few things:

Do not overprocess and let my mind rest. When I am considering big decisions, I find that all the what if’s begin to spiral in my mental cavity. I am reminded of the importance of holding every thought captive and channeling my thoughts into prayerful, reflective, strategic spaces.

Sabotage the sabotage: When I am contemplating big decisions and feel uncertain, procrastination, distraction, and doubt settle in. I want to sabotage the sabotage and keep moving into spaces where God is inviting me to risk and trust Him more fully.

Converse with a few trusted souls: It is essential for me to be engaging with a few trusted souls. I am so grateful for good people in my life, and I must create the space to have meaningful conversations. It always seems when I do this, my capacity increases because the good that is within me takes root and the extra is sifted out, giving me more room to think, feel, breathe and live!

My mind and heart feel very full, and it is good for me to remind myself what I need. I like to pick one song each week to really listen to often. This one has calmed my soul this week and reminds me that God holds me and cares about every last detail. I am looking forward to moving through a few things this week that I anticipate will bring me greater peace. But when I am at peace, anxious, filled to my capacity or fully relaxed,  may I never stop singing Give me Jesus!

 

 

Tonight I am troubled. I don’t find it beneficial to engage in political talk these days, and at times the choice to stay silent is equally disturbing. I understand that there are many different views and perspectives, but I do not see how what is reported here can ever be supported. I do not know how we can be silent about what is transpiring among us?

And so tonight, in my distraught state, I am choosing to share these words with my niece and nephew. I want them to be able to look back someday and know that in the midst of the chaos that swirls in the news about what the President of the United States believes about the people of Haiti, we will not be silent. We will choose to celebrate their country of birth, their heritage, their family who resides in Haiti and always embrace their stories.

These two are from the beautiful country of Haiti! They have brought life, color, laughter, joy, and delight to the Borgdorff family. We embrace every bit of Haiti that flows through them and stand in gratitude tonight for their presence in our lives. Forever and always we will hold their hearts.