“When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives mean the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand. The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing and face with us the reality of our powerlessness, that is a friend who cares.”
— Henri J.M. Nouwen (The Road to Daybreak: A Spiritual Journey)
I really like Henri Nouwen and appreciate his perspective and wisdom on how to love people well. I am also a strong believer that real connection happens for us when we are sharing in our struggles more than sharing about where we celebrate success. I wonder what comes to mind when you read the quote by Henri Nouwen?
I am committed again to pay close attention to when I may be someone who is “giving advice, solutions, or cures” and missing the invitation to simply listen and be present in the midst of someone’s struggle.
I want to be a friend who is able to “tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing and face with us the reality of our powerlessness…”
I want to be a friend who cares!
Wow Trish, this really says a lot!! Thank you for sharing this! It really challenges me to do the same, which isn’t easy to do! This also brings up some personal questions for me to ask myself. I find that I am very protective about letting others into the pain with me. Sitting in the silence with others is not easy. Anyway, thank you for sharing this!
Love you friend!
Cindy