(This blog was written May 29, 2018, 8 days after my Dad died. He had a seven-week journey from his diagnosis of brain cancer to his death. Now, almost six years later, we still miss him, and my Mom and the rest of us still live in peace. For that, we are grateful! I came across it tonight and wanted to repost it. May we all live at peace, in our living and dying!)
During the last eight weeks, I have been honored to witness how peace prevails amid illness. There are so many spaces that my parents could have lacked peace. Yet from the day of my Dad’s seizure to his unexpected death, through the diagnosis of cancer and in difficult conversations about whether to seek treatment, the presence of peace was undeniable.
I remember my Dad telling a Doctor who came into his room before his biopsy was even done that he doesn’t like to discuss all the “what if” conversations. He wanted to wait until the biopsy came back and then consider what we know to be true. He had a way of setting the tone and ensuring that my Mom and Dad did not clutter their minds and hearts with unneeded thoughts.
As my parents processed that my Dad had a life-ending diagnosis, it was clear to so many that peace prevailed. In their conversations, their communications, their presence, and their hearts, their words carried peace.
Here are a few snippets from a variety of their communications:
one of the things that has surprised me some is the calmness with which (so far, at least) we have been able to accept the reality of what is.
We find ourselves in a new space and discover that there are unexpected blessings in these moments.
My prognosis will have to await further information, but we wanted you all to know that we are doing well, are grateful for each day, and rest in the assurance that all of our days are in God’s hands. Blessed be the Name of the Lord.
I share this and record this so we never forget that my Dad did not fear the end of his life. He was committed to living one day at a time and trusting God to care for him, my Mom, and us!
I am so grateful to be reminded that living in peace does not mean life is without trouble. There are questions, sorrow, uncertainty, and hardship, but none of that can entirely erode our peace.
My parents lived with great courage and profound peace in living and dying.
Today at Church, we talked about Love. It was one of those messages I want to listen to again. There were words of invitation and words that felt like God was speaking them as a gentle reminder of his Word. Those are reassuring moments in my heart.
I am often aware of a conflict in my heart. I sincerely believe that His mercies are new every morning, and it is a gift to wake up and live each new day!
I read this today, and the words pivot and rhythm caught my eye. Two weeks of recovery have given me time to consider my rhythms. With Spring coming, it feels like a good time to evaluate what is no longer working for me.
I have had the privilege of working alongside refugee families in refugee resettlement. These families, now dear friends, have profoundly enriched my life. They have established a solid way of life and future. No matter what country they come from, everyone has confronted is learning English! Their journey has not been simple, but they have struggled well, grieved what they have lost, and are grateful for what they now have. They are true heroes!
When I saw this, I had to smile. Anxiety. It is real and comes as a result of many things, but surely this “fun” game of perfection didn’t help any of us! 🙂
I know of times I denied my heart sorrow and my eyes their tears. Therapy was so helpful for me in identifying, naming, embracing, and feeling the places I have denied grief and tears.
I read this and had to smile. The never-ending tension between introverts and extroverts. It reminded me of when I used to lead groups. We would talk about how everyone has a personality style, but when engaging in conversation, it is healthy to all take our appropriate space at the table.
