Sorrow and Joy…

I have learned over this last year about the tension of holding two conflicting emotions in the same space in my heart and learning to give space to both….

I find this to be one of the most difficult spaces to create…joy in the sand

Often I believe we want to make room for what is most socially acceptable and squelch the emotion or feeling that feels like an unwelcome guest…

It seems I continue to encounter people who are facing conflicting emotions this holiday season….

I wonder how you embrace conflicting emotions in your own heart….sorrow

I wonder how you embrace conflicting emotions in the lives of those you love….

I wonder how you embrace conflicting emotions when a friend or acquaintance shares this tension…

I have found that acknowledging that you hear both is a very kind response:

I hear that during this season of Joy your heart also holds a lot of grief 

I want to let you know that I understand the tension of both enjoying and dreading the holidays…

I admire your ability to acknowledge that you still grieve your loss after all the years and delight in watching your family celebrate….

As I have gotten older, I have a greater understanding and sensitivity to the tensions many (myself included) will feel in the coming week. When I began to share that recently with a friend, that I am aware of my own anxiety during the holidays, she said, but I thought you enjoyed Christmas and your family.

Yes, I do enjoy Christmas and my family and yes I will have more anxiety than normal in the coming weeks. A change in routine, the tension of maintaining a good food routine and the reality of having caregivers on the road during winter and snow (maybe) and holidays all contribute. But yes, I hold conflicting emotions often and I would guess some of you may understand this in some way…

I hope you will take time to be aware and kind to all your heart holds in the next 10 days….


Author: trishborgdorff

I am on a life long journey to live with integrity, honesty, kindness and full of grace.

2 thoughts on “Sorrow and Joy…”

  1. Trish, even this morning Richard and I are walking with grief journey with a dear friend and this expresses so well the big A word (besides, A buse…….Ambivalence!) Have a blessed holy-day! our love, B & R

  2. Wow – reading backward through your wonderful posts -through the memories, through the sorrow, and through hearts of Christmas hope and joy in a dark world – to find a few days before your big journey of Sorrow and Joy, you wrote about it. May the Prince of peace continue to embrace you and your family.

Share your thoughts with me please...