Month: April 2012

Disappointment…

Tonight I was going to take Peter (almost 9), Isaiah (almost 6) and Johanna (almost 3) swimming at MVP.

I was ready to go pick them up when I remembered I had forgotten to ensure there was open swim…

Well, based on the title of this blog, I bet you can guess the answer. Nope, no open swim till 7 pm.

I called to the Bos home to let them know. And with that I heard Johanna burst into tears. She wasn’t hurt, she wasn’t being teased or bothered by her brothers, she was just plain disappointed!

Within moments I hear Isaiah tell her that we are still going to MVP to shoot baskets and the crying ceased….but when I came to pick them up, she was able to say, “I really wanted to go swimming Aunt Trish!”

I have been thinking about that for the last few hours. I think about what a scene it would be if we all wailed for a moment or two when we were disappointed. What if that was socially acceptable for all ages? I am not advocating for that by any means, but I am curious about how we have numbed the ache of disappointment. Are you one who says it doesn’t matter, or perhaps you are one who doesn’t hold expectations much anymore. Are you one who numbs the ache with shopping, food or alcohol….

I wonder if you take out your ache of disappointment on other people or if you are even aware of how you cope…

There is something so refreshing to me to observe the full range of emotions that a 2-year-old lives out. God created us with that range of emotion. Yes, I believe we are called to maturity, but also to live true to the full range of emotion within us. I would dare to say that if we live fully alive, we will deal with disappointment on a daily (or almost daily) basis. Consider naming your disappointment next time you feel it. Talk about what your expectation was and what the reality is. I believe if we could start with being honest about our disappointment, we would also experience a greater sense of emotional maturity!

Consider Johanna’s response today as an invitation to live honestly when you are disappointed.

Life…

I am a lover of words…

I would much rather make a word collage than a picture collage, although I have enjoyed picture collages as well.

I wonder if you were invited to make a word collage what words you would choose to surround the words LIFE. I found this one tonight and look forward to creating my own in the coming days. Visit http://www.wordle.net/ as a fun place to create….

I was reflecting today on how Easter is all about LIFE….

I don’t want to lose the impact of the Resurrection in the busyness of the day-to-day….

I hope to live my life fully alive, deeply grateful and with a willingness to sacrifice much as Christ sacrificed for me!

 

 

Easter Dinner…

It was an unusual Easter Dinner, in that all of my siblings were with their in-laws. That makes for a very exciting Easter Dinner every other year. Today I enjoyed a quiet dinner with my parents, Aunt Anita and Uncle Bob, Aunt Wilma and Uncle Adrian, Aunt Dot and Grandma B. During the coffee hour I was tickled by the fact that here I sat with my parents and my extended family all having 30+ years of life on me and I enjoy the company fully.

Dinner was full of conversation and as I reflect I am grateful for the connection we enjoy. There was conversation of the varied sermons and views to the Resurrection story. I  listened to stories of my grandparents and we heard stories from the immigration journey, including how one little girl died on the boat en route and they stopped at night as this child was buried at sea. We spoke of cancer and hair growth, hope for the hurting and tender moments where honest reflection connected us all.

I am thankful for the quiet Easter dinner where I witnessed the rich heritage of faith in my family.

I am thankful to have worshiped this morning sitting between my 5 and 8-year-old nephews, sharing communion, and marveling at their understanding of Christ is Risen…Christ is Risen Indeed!

I am very aware of my faith tonight…

I am very aware of my heritage tonight…

I am very aware that I serve a risen savior and I am deeply grateful for Christ’s work on the cross and that His Resurrection offers me life!

Fun and Faith…

Today I took a road trip to deliver a rescue pup my friends adopted while visiting Michigan on  spring vacation. Due to process, she could not go home with them last week, so we met up half way and united this abandoned stray with her new family.

My niece Anne and I set out this morning, picked up Kala (named because she was found as a stray in Kalamazoo) and headed towards Elgin Ill. The woman who was passing the dog off asked me how old my kids are, as I was moving a booster around in my car. I quickly said, oh, I don’t have any kids, but I am blessed with 14 nieces and nephews. My niece Anne quickly told her, really it is like she has 14….

I often believe I have the best situation possible being an aunt (when it comes to “parenting” that is). I enjoy much of the freedom and the fun and then return them all home. Today, I had a greater appreciation for those of you who sit in the passenger seat while your child practices driving.

Anneliese came with me on my road trip today in order to gain some experience and bank some hours of drive time. I threatened to put on headphones and text my friends while she drove, but I really did want to enjoy my time with her. 🙂

It was quite an experience as she drove from Elgin IL, through Chicago and into Michigan. I learned much about deep breathing and not stating every thought that entered my mind. I believe I was pretty relaxed as we worked together to ensure we were in the right lane, navigated Chicago chaos and crossing many lanes of traffic. Anne has a great head on her shoulders and made very good quick decisions as she moved my 2011 Ford Edge over many miles. I admire all you parents even more tonight as I call it a day. And I am so proud of Anne and her driving abilities!

And as Anne slept after we passed through Michigan City, I listened again to my theme song for the year….http://trishborgdorff.com/2012/01/03/my-2012-song/

This song is called Untitled Hymn by Chris Rice. As I listened and sang, I realized that the words really represent my faith journey. I am deeply grateful for Christ’s work on the cross and how because of Easter, I am given true life (both on earth and eternity) and hope! But I do want to be clear that even in everything this weekend holds in my faith, being a follower of Jesus does not guarantee me a life without struggle. But I do believe deep in my being that because of my faith, I have a context for my hardship, I have much to celebrate, I have a reason to love, I am deeply grateful for grace and I have purpose to live….

It is my hope that you will listen to Untitled Hymn by Chris Rice and hear the invitation to live honestly each day with Jesus!

Because of the Old Rugged Cross,

Happy Easter to you all!

Chris Rice – Untitled Hymn (Come To Jesus) Lyrics

Weak and wounded sinner
Lost and left to die
O, raise your head, for love is passing by
Come to Jesus
Come to Jesus
Come to Jesus and live!

Now your burden’s lifted
And carried far away
And precious blood has washed away the stain, so
Sing to Jesus
Sing to Jesus
Sing to Jesus and live!

And like a newborn baby
Don’t be afraid to crawl
And remember when you walk
Sometimes we fall…so
Fall on Jesus
Fall on Jesus
Fall on Jesus and live!

Sometimes the way is lonely
And steep and filled with pain
So if your sky is dark and pours the rain, then
Cry to Jesus
Cry to Jesus
Cry to Jesus and live!

O, and when the love spills over
And music fills the night
And when you can’t contain your joy inside, then
Dance for Jesus
Dance for Jesus
Dance for Jesus and live!

And with your final heartbeat
Kiss the world goodbye
Then go in peace, and laugh on Glory’s side, and
Fly to Jesus
Fly to Jesus
Fly to Jesus and live!

 

Tenebrae Service…

“The distinctive ceremony of Tenebrae is the gradual extinguishing of candles during readings from the gospels which describe the time between the Last Supper and the Passion of Christ. Another frequent element in Protestant Tenebrae services is the inclusion of the last seven sayings of Jesus, assembled from the various gospel accounts. When the last passage has been read the church or room is completely dark and recalls the days when Jesus was in the tomb.”

There was deep meaning tonight at the Tenebrae Service…

There was a powerful silence tonight at the Tenebrae Service….

There was an eerieness to the darkness that settled in as the lights and candles were extinguished…

There was power in the words sung at the Tenebrae Service tonight….

It is always captivating to my soul to hear the words of the Scripture of the betrayal, the rejection,, the loneliness Jesus must have felt…

I am thankful for worship experiences that remind me of the deep meaning of events way back when that still have an impact in my heart today!

 

 

holding a nail…

I have a nail next to my bed this week…

each night i spend some time holding it, fingering it, wondering about it….

I find myself caught between the why and the wonder…

The words are not abundant when I think of this nail and all it represents…

The feelings of my heart seem to run deep….

Who would ever believe that The Old Rugged Cross would bring about hope…

Who would ever believe that my sin is forgiven by Jesus blood…

I am thankful that I was invited to believe and I embraced truth….it is a life changing nail!

From the cradle to the cross….I am deeply grateful!

 

 

 

Do you hear what I am saying…

As I wrap up my day I realize I learned some valuable lessons today…

It seems that most people I spoke to today were hard of hearing….

I learned that when I am speaking to someone who is hard of hearing, it isn’t all about how loud I speak. It is about pitch and speed and volume and tenderness and understanding….

I learned that when I am speaking to someone who is hard of hearing, often they would rather pretend to hear than say they don’t, so checking in to ensure facts are clear is imperative and kind…

I learned that sometimes the questions that follow are asked to ensure they did hear what was said…

I learned that sometimes no matter how many times I say “THIS IS TRISH FROM VISITING ANGELS” those words will not be heard. Trying another combination of words or finding a word that gives context, can help to move the conversation along….

I learned that my hearing is something to be thankful for every day…

I learned that life can be affected in many big and small ways if someone struggles with hearing loss (or if someone you love struggles with hearing loss)…

May we all strive to have compassion and understanding for anyone, young or old, who struggles with hearing loss….

Thankful for today and the many communication lessons I learned about how to love people more fully!

 

 

 

Is that your weekly plan…

Recently my nephew Peter stood at my fridge and asked me if the picture below was my weekly plan….

Peter has grown up with my attempts (sometimes success at greater levels than others) to live a life of planning and routine…

I had to smile and consider the wisdom in his question. I believe the words in this weekly plan may fit me better than the plan of structure and routine I often strive for….

In the event you can’t make out the words: Sleep In, Keep Going, all will be well, hope, trust, light a candle, be still, might as well laugh, be strong, embrace change, curse the darkness, pray, forget regret, dance, hold on, skip exercise, shopping couldn’t hurt, live the moment, have more chocolate, a bath makes everything better, know, swear, move on, sing, dare, risk, veg out, be amazing, go back to bed, rest, have chocolate, breathe…

I will need to tell Peter I considered his question and so I want to say clearly, “YES, Peter, this is my weekly plan!” (with a gym trip a day added in)

Go and live well and have fun living!

 

The feeling of guilt…

Tonight I thought a cop was following me.

I realized the all too familiar feeling that sweeps over me whenever I realize a cop near by…the feeling of guilt….

I have been curious about this but haven’t really been able to figure it out….

Most often I am within the limits of the law, and yet I can’t quite shake the fear of being caught….

I would guess I am not alone. I have figured this out by the number of brake lights that are applied when a cop car is seen.

As we journey through Holy Week, I wonder why I don’t experience the same feeling when I see the cross….

I would like to be more aware of what the cost of my sin has been and where because of Jesus, I can embrace GRACE….

I am hoping somehow the feelings I carry when I see a cop car can be neutralized.

I am hoping that I will always feel the sorrow of my sin when I see (or consider) Jesus on the cross….and always consider the invitation to confess, repent, embrace Grace and Celebrate!

 

The miracle of nail growth….

A few weeks ago I cashed in on a Christmas gift card from my Dad and got a manicure with Shellac polish…

I must say that as much as I love nail polish that doesn’t chip, I am equally awed by the miracle of nail growth that is evident when I have my nails polished…

I did a little reasearch and read the following:

Fingernails are composed of protein fibers called keratin which is the same protein hair is made of. Growth occurs from the moon shaped area seen at the base of the nail which is sometimes known as the growth plate. As the nail grows, cells from the matrix multiply, mature, and die. Upon death, they become filled with this protein matrix which gives the nail its tough, hard exterior.

I must say that information does not change the miracle of nail growth. It reminds me that my body has many functions that happen every day, day in and day out.

I hope I will never lose the amazing miracles that occur in me and around me every day.

But just for the record, I don’t plan to grow my nails in this fashion. She has not cut them for 22 years and pays 500 every time she enter the salon. I am not sure that is amazing or crazy, but regardless, I am thankful for nail growth and nail clippers! 🙂