Month: May 2021

Today was sweet, and my heart is tender and content.

We knew it would be a good day to be together.

And it was a good day together.

I did not take many pictures, and so I leave you with these words.

Borgdorff, Peter

11/14/1939 – 5/21/2018

You are remembered for the man you were, the wisdom you shared, and your love for God, the Church, and your family. You are missed, and we carry on! Forever in our hearts!

With all our love:

Janet, Marcia, Olivia, Noah and Lauren, Sonta, Jean-Marc, Nick and Jonna, Andrew, Ryan, Arlene and Dan, Janneke and Matt, Ellis, Francis, Henry, Anneliese, Karolyn, Ellie, Trish, Suzi and Andy, Peter, Isaiah, Johanna, and Dorothy.

I have grown to value the gift of remembering. As I have worked through my story, invited others to consider there’s and journeyed through losing people dear to me, it is important to me to honor remembering spaces.

Tonight and tomorrow, we remember the journey of my Dad’s last weeks. These last weeks I have been reflecting on the 7 weeks from his diagnosis to his death. We did not know he would have only 7 weeks, and it was not long enough.

But how long is long enough?

Really tomorrow, we celebrate my Dad’s life. My Dad was given 78 years. He was a man who enjoyed living. He did not focus on his own health habits much. He enjoyed his pipe, and he considered Southern Comfort to be the best whiskey! He loved his family, his friends, his work, and the Church. My Dad traveled the world and loved to take a trip. As I got older, it will always be dear to me how he loved and cared for my Mom. It was clear she was his favorite person.

My Dad lived fully till the end. The morning he went to the hospital for sudden onset of pain, he and my Mom were planning to go to Church. We did not know that May 21, 2018, would be his last day until a few hours into the ER visit. It was clear that he was fading, and we gathered and stood with him and stood together. God’s grace released him quickly as he transitioned to his heavenly home. I am grateful that it was not weeks or even days that he lingered. And with that day, we went from enjoying him to remembering him. There will always be an ache in that.

We will remember together tomorrow. We will continue to live and laugh and love. We will continue to honor my Dad’s life and live in the ways he and my Mom have taught us. We continue to admire my Mom’s courage to live fully, even though she has lost her sounding board, companion, and soul mate.

I wonder how you do with honoring your remembering spaces? Be creative, create space, and allow your heart to honor the joy and the sorrow. Grief is complicated, but it is best processed in remembering!

I miss you, Dad,

Blessed be His name!

 

Part of my writing project every day of 2021 is not to plan my posts ahead of time. I don’t want this to be a teaching or a preaching blog. I want this to be an honest expression of my heart.

Sometimes I sit in the quiet for 5 minutes, and I start typing, and other nights like tonight, it has been over an hour. Sometimes I think I know where I am going with a thought, but then it comes out different than what I thought.

This process of writing is good for my soul. Tonight has been tough to know what to write about.

• I heard stories today of dear friends with limited access to their loved one in the hospital due to COVID 19. He passed away a few hours later. My heart breaks for them.
• I read news clips of an execution that took place today. There are reports that race played a significant part in his trial. I am almost physically sick by this reality in our world today.
• I read stories of dear people coming out and putting a voice to their stories of gender and identity. I am disrupted to the core that we fight over this issue in the church and do not embrace their stories and freedom.
• I joined weight watchers and am easily overwhelmed by all the information. Just count my food points, one point at a time. 🙂
• I had a bad experience with a local plumbing company. I spoke up and advocated for myself and was treated poorly. It angers me so, and I refuse to turn into the bitch I feel like becoming. In the end, I was clear, disappointed, and paid the bill even though I can’t entirely agree with them. I decided to pay, and I am still angry, and I am glad I did not become ugly.
• We are two days away from the 3rd anniversary of my Dad’s death. My heart is tender. We will gather as a family, and that is always a sweet time.
• We are planning to put flowers at my brother’s grave for Memorial Day. That is always an experience that feels honoring and so sad.

Any one of those bullets could be a blog. Tonight I can not find my way through my thoughts. I invite you into the reality that sometimes life events fill our minds and our hearts.

Lord, hear my jumbled thoughts and words of my heart. Give us courage as your children to make a difference in every way presented to us.

Even in the chaos, Lord, Blessed be Your name!

“The class of 2021” are words spoken all over the world. And yet when you sit in an audience and hear those words, there is likely one or two or a few dear faces who represent this class in your own heart and story.

Tonight we had a casual dinner to celebrate one of those members of the class of 2021. We snapped a bunch of photos and enjoyed the comfortable gift of being together.

I remember my own graduation and other significant events and was keenly aware of the wide range of competing emotions. There is a sense of relief and accomplishment, joy and sorrow, hope and fear, reflection and dreaming, confidence and doubt, and often topped off with laughter and maybe some tears.

I am grateful as I have grown older, I have learned those are not competing emotions, but more a wide range of God-given expressions of all our hearts hold. As a younger person, I remember thinking it was an either/or emotional world. I am so grateful to now understand it is a both/and journey we are all on.

Tonight, hats off to the class of 2021, all over the world!

But in my small corner, my heart is full, and my eyes are damp as I celebrate my nephew Peter! Good work, young man!
You have done it and done it well.
You maintained kindness, faith, compassion, and a good work ethic!

I love you so!

Blessed be His name

Another aspect of making that graduation video is what music to put the pictures to. I have found that music/lyrics can make or break the enjoyment of a homemade video.

I hope I am not the only one who thinks I know a song, but upon more careful study of the lyrics, I realize those are not the words that I sing exactly.

In some sense, they are close, but different words change meanings, and I often like “my version of the lyrics a bit more.

I wonder how often that happens to us, not only when looking at song lyrics but when we listen to one another. Do we hear the words the other person says, or do we hear words that fit the song or the message we believe in?

I am working hard on my listening skills. Even when I am aware and can name my downfalls, if I am not intentional, it is easy for me to change the “lyrics” of whatever is being said!

I find it a consistent space where I am invited to repent and go again when I choose to believe I know the lyrics of what you are saying, and I begin to sing along, never really listening to what your story is bringing to me.

Lord, give me ears to hear!

Let it be so!

Blessed be His name.

 

 

I watched this clip this morning, and I felt like it was a little bit of heaven. There is diversity in so many ways. 

There is joy and movement. 

There is connection and celebration. 

There are moments here that don’t happen every day for so many.

My friend’s daughter participated. I sent a message saying I would like to donate to this place. It feels like they are prioritizing the right things. 

“It’s underwritten in some way, and the buddies are volunteers. There is no cost to us for the class, shoes or costumes. She was even given a dance jacket with the studio name. She loves it and will be back next year.”

I would suggest making it full screen so you can really delight in all the interaction on stage!

Check out the website if you also want to donate or learn more!

Blessed be His name!

http://www.integritydance.com/

Tonight I lost myself in photos. I think many of us are doing that this time of year with graduations. Something happens to my heart when I look back over the many years of life since I became an aunt.

 

 

 

 

 

 

I also went to a shower today for my nephew’s fiance. We have known Lauren for more than 13 years, and it is still so fun to dream of what lies ahead for her and Noah.

As I sort pictures, I find myself praying for each of them. Life is complicated and complex. It is also wonderful, full of adventure, dreams, and relationships.

At the same time, they make such big decisions about who to date or not date, where to work or not work, how to save, invest, and when to spend. They are buying homes and pursuing academic achievements. They are no longer playing super hero’s, and they still love to spend time together. They talk now about bigger issues and politics, the Church, and what their futures hold. They are growing up, and I am so proud of every one of them. Johanna, my youngest niece, is now 12. Now Janneke and Matt are growing their family with delightful young ones. And so my heart grows some more, and so it goes!

When I lose myself in pictures, I am reminded just how much of my heart they have! This group of amazing people and their added ones will forever have my support!

I would invite you to take some time to look at some pictures and be reminded about who has your heart. Have they felt your commitment for them lately?

Do they need to hear your words of affirmation? Do you need to write a note or pick up the phone?

I love being reminded of who has my heart. It reminds me just how full of love my heart is…from both giving and receiving. Give and receive an abundance of love today.

Do you ever feel fatigued and just need to be reminded to keep trying?

Do you ever feel weary and just need to be reminded to get up and move?

Do you ever wonder if your life inspires anyone and just need to be reminded that you are an inspiration?

Do you ever feel like you can’t give much more but then decide to keep helping?

Do you ever doubt everything around you and then hear that little voice that says, keep believing?

Do you ever feel stuck and feel like life is in a rut, and you are reminded of the importance of dreaming.

Do you ever feel a bit despairing but then remember there is power in hoping!

Do you ever, at the end of every day, remind yourself that even when it is hard, it is always good to keep loving!

And at the end of a day, when your heart is either depleted and worn out or full of hope and goodness, remember, you got this!

Are you looking for a good movie to watch?

I was reminded of an excellent movie we recently watched during a winter night during COVID. Our good movie list is long from that season, but this is one I would like to suggest you all watch.

A Secret Love is a heartwarming story described like this: Falling in love in 1947, two women — Pat Henschel and pro baseball player Terry Donahue — begin a 65-year journey of love and overcoming prejudice.

The story will open your eyes and your heart. Those are the best kind of movies!

I have owned Visiting Angels of West Michigan since 2003. The journey has been a solid adventure. There is a sense of new and unexpected at every turn, and over time, I can say that nothing feels totally new to me anymore. I am grateful for the teacher of time, which allows me to rest in my gut responses in so many situations.

We have had short seasons when we would say we must hire more caregivers. Often the solution to that was pouring some more energy into the hiring side of the business, and over time, we would feel fully staffed again.

As I reflect, I would say that hiring has gotten more difficult over the last 5 to 7 years. Even though we would find those we need, it might take a little longer, or we would find that when we lost our college graduates at the end of any given year, we could not hire the same amount of caregivers back.

We are now in a season where the majority of calls we receive are potential clients inquiring about caregiver availability. We used to pride ourselves on saying YES. Now we find it difficult to accept new clients. We have 50+caregivers hard at work. They say yes to working as often as possible, and we are so grateful, but it isn’t enough caregiver capacity to say yes to all our incoming calls.

We are in a difficult season as employers. We do not have enough workers. I know we are not alone. The struggle is across the board. Help wanted is across the nation and in all kinds of industries.

If you are reading this and you are a praying person, pray that workers would come forward and fill the gap. I would love to hire 20 caregivers. We are doing everything we can to entice people to join our multitude of angels. Surely, in West Michigan, 20 people would like to work with us and serve the needs of others. But also pray for other places that have intense needs.

I can honestly say that in year 19, I expected that I might be weary, but I never expected that I would be weary from saying, “No, I am sorry we can not help you at this time.”

I love answering the phone, hearing the stories, and being reminded that there are people who need our services. But I hope and pray that in a short window of time, we will be able to say yes a whole lot more than no.

Please, Lord Jesus, Let it be so!

Blessed be His name.

If you want to apply at Visiting Angels of West Michigan, please call Heather at 616 243 7080. We would welcome the opportunity to speak with you! We ask for a minimum of 15 hours per week and two weekends a month of availability. We would love for you to be the reason we can say Yes, a whole lot more than no!